The Premier League is back this weekend and Cheeky is here to give you all of his best tips ahead of the action, with odds from Paddy Power throughout.
Leicester City v Arsenal
Jamie ‘Steptoe’ Vardy loves scoring against Arsenal. Indeed the former England international/Rag-and-bone man from Oil Drum Lane has notched 11 times in the Premier League against the Gunners. The 34-year-old forward has been in red hot form for the Foxes this season, too, scoring seven goals from nine Premier League matches. 7/2 he scores first on Saturday? I like them apples, likesay.
Burnley v Brentford
Not the most glamorous fixture of the weekend but it’s an intriguing clash nonetheless. Brentford are unbeaten away from home in the Premier League this season (two wins, two draws) while Burnley have taken just four points from a possible 27 and sit third bottom. And yet the away win is 17/10. That is a bet, no? That said, am I really the man to be taking financial advice from? Full disclosure: two days before payday last week I was wiping my arse with Lindt chocolate bunnies as I had no bog roll left in the house.
Liverpool v Brighton
Now I’m not the kind of tipster to suck my own nipples or anything, but I did confidently stick up Liverpool to win at OT last week. Granted, I didn’t envisage it turning into quite the massacre that unfolded, but 6/5 against about the away win was giving it away in hindsight. You know, sometimes I shock myself with the smart stuff I say or do. Then there are other times when I try to get out of the car with my seatbelt on. The Reds are 2/9 shots here having won two and drawn two at Anfield so far.
However Brighton have also won two and drawn two from four matches away from The Amex, so that price looks a little short for me. Liverpool are averaging a whopping 3.67 goals per game in the league so far this season so if you fancy the home win the best shout is probably backing Klopp’s men and over 3.5 goals.
Manchester City v Crystal Palace
The Citizens have scored nine goals in their last two matches on the road and their form is starting to look a bit ominous for their rivals. They are two points behind Chelsea at the top and should batter Palace here, all things being equal.
Gabriel Jesus has five assists so far, at an average of 0.76 assists per game. There will be worse wagers struck this weekend than backing him at 21/10 to conjure an assist anytime against the Eagles.
Newcastle United v Chelsea
Lucien Favre’s odds have shortened considerably for the Toon job but Newcastle look to have their work cut out on Saturday against the league leaders. Newcastle have lost five of their last six Premier League meetings with Chelsea, who are flying under Thomas Tuchel and who have goal threats all over the park. If the Blues can keep Callum Wilson quiet they should win this with a bit to spare.
Mason Mount looks too big at 13/2 to score first. The boy is quality. If you dislike Mason Mount even 1% then am sorry, we can’t be f**king pals.
Watford v Southampton
Now I know in the grand scheme of things nobody cares about my degenerate losing bets but how the f**k did Everton get blitzed at home to Watford last weekend? What type of fresh lunacy was that? Watford just turning up and going full Bayern Munich in that incredible second half. The Tinkerman is box office. And based on last weekend’s brilliant effort, the Hornets should not be bigger than 2/1 here. Home win.
Tottenham v Manchester United
Ole Gunnar Solskjaer is expected to remain in charge as Manchester United manager for this trip to Spurs despite their heavy defeat at the hands of Liverpool. Football Twitter is grim but was totally insane in the aftermath of that 5-0 defeat. Grown men writing things like ‘Missing – Ghostiano Penaldo’. And folk retweeting this nonsense. One win in five for United. Shipped 11 goals in three games. Does Ole even know his best team? McFred does not, never has and never will work. So it will be interesting to see how they line up in north London. They just look like an expensive rabble of individuals right now, and for a massive club that should be aiming for the top honours every season, such shocking pressing stats are another telling indicator of the direction in which the team is going.
Amazingly, despite the current s**t show, they are favourites to beat Spurs. I just can’t get my napper round that. A club in crisis yet Spurs are 15/8. At home. The famous racing journalist Richard Baerlein fancied Shergar to win the Derby in 1981 and used the phrase ‘Now is the time to bet like men’ when imploring his readers to have a punt. I feel not dissimilar about Tottenham’s price here.
Norwich City v Leeds United
Two struggling teams collide on Sunday. Marcelo Bielsa’s Leeds appear to be suffering from an acute dose of second-season syndrome, and their start has to be a worry for those connected to the Yorkshire giants. Norwich, the very definition of a yo-yo club, are obviously not good enough for the Premier League but too sharp for all those cats in the Championship. If I had to row in I would say Leeds win this, but I would prefer to have a smaller interest on a 2-2 finish.
Aston Villa v West Ham
Michail Antonio has made nine direct goal contributions for the Hammers (six goals and three assists) in just eight Premier League games this season. Antonio has bags of strength and technique. A nightmare for defenders. Next stop is Villa Park and he’s 9/2 to notch first. Hit me.
Wolves v Everton
I cannot get over the state of Everton’s defending against Watford. It was beyond shambolic. They’ve not got a bad squad, the Blues, but were overrun in midfield in that second half last week and I fancy Wolves to pick them off on Monday night. Wolves have been decent for much of the season so far without getting much rub. They outplayed both Man United and Tottenham but ended up losing, and were excellent against Leicester but lost at the King Power, too. In short, Bruno Lage knows his onions.
Odds correct at the time of publication. 18+ Please Gamble Responsibly. Visit begambleaware.org
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